What you'll learn from this episode:
- What this podcast is all about
- How I used to be a serial dieter who kept gaining weight
- What changed to help me lose the weight for the last time without counting calories or cutting out food groups
- Why you start a diet with the best intentions but end up not eating the way you want
- How to take the action you want so you can have more control over your eating
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What is this podcast all about?
Before I get into the juicy details of why you’re not taking the action you want, and what to do about it, I’m going to first get into who I am and what this podcast is all about
This podcast is for anyone who wants to lose the weight for the last time without the restriction and deprivation that comes along with traditional dieting.
Every week I’ll go through tips and strategies to achieve lasting weight loss. Everything from fitness to nutrition to mindset and confidence
I’m not into woo-woo stuff and fluff. This is straight forward real advice that works
Who Am I?
I’m Ariel Boyle and I’m certified integrative Nutrition Health Coach as well as a Life Coach and Weight Coach. I’m sure you’re wondering why do I do this and why should you listen to me?
I used to be like you. I was a serial dieter. And for a time it worked.
I played varsity sports in high school so my metabolism was super high so my lack of nutritional knowledge didn’t matter much. At the time I thought broccoli cheddar soup in a bread bowl at Panera was healthy because broccoli was in the name.
In college I was more sedentary so I had to work harder counting points and calories. But all the partying and sleeping in I did made it easier to stick with it. If I’m drunk for 5 hours and sleep for 13 then I really didn’t have to deal with as many waking hours dieting. Every time I would gain weight I’d just go back to dieting to lose it. And walking all over a very hilly campus helped.
But once I hit the real world a.k.a. corporate life, I had to deal with sitting at a desk all day. Having the option to grab a snack whenever I wanted. I had the funds to order any kind of delivery I wanted. And I was so tired.
So, my weight ballooned…
Over the next 7 years I would gain weight and lose it through dieting. Then I would gain more weight back and lose it.
I didn’t understand. I’ve researched everything about eating healthy. Why couldn’t I stick to these damn diets? I tried keto, plant based, intermittent fasting, Weight Watchers and I couldn’t stick to any of them.
My Turning Point
Eventually I decided to become a Health Coach. Part of me thought, if I learn how to teach people to be healthy, I could help myself lose the weight. And my Health Coach certification gave me a ton of tools about living a healthy lifestyle and all different ways of creating healthy habits.
But, when I went through Life Coach and Weight Coach training, that’s when everything finally fell together. I had all of the knowledge about healthy foods but I was missing why I wasn’t taking action that I knew was better for me in the long run.
With these new tools, I finally lost the weight I had gained over all of those years. But more importantly, I did it for the first time with no points counting and no food restrictions.
I learned how to take the action I wanted and how to create a way of eating that was right for me.
And that included pizza and doughnuts sometimes.
Once I became my first successful client, I knew I had to show others that there was a better way to weight loss.
When You Don’t Take The Action You Want
I’m going to run you through a scenario that will might sound familiar to you
Today is the day. You’re ready to start your diet. You want the increased energy, to feel confident in pictures. You want it and you’re ready.
Day 1 goes great. You meal prepped the night before. You even resisted the smell of French fries as you walked passed the McDonalds near your office as you went for a lunchtime stroll
It was hard to stick with it but you feel confident.
Now it’s day 5 of the diet. You’ve been so good all week. You walk into the office on Friday and someone brought in doughnuts. Not just any doughnuts, doughnuts from your favorite place. Oh and look there’s your favorite, a maple bar!
They look so good and they smell fresh still. You think to yourself, I shouldn’t have it. I want to lose the weight so badly. But I’ve been so good these past few days. It probably won’t matter if I have 1 doughnut. Summer isn’t for a few months anyway. I have time still to reach my weight goal.
So, you eat the maple bar.
Immediately after finishing it you feel the guilt weighing on you. Ugh I shouldn’t have done that.
I can’t believe I only lasted 4 days. I might as well just enjoy the rest of the day eating what I want and start over again tomorrow.
Does this sound familiar?
You start of a diet with good intentions but then you end up slipping up. I’m sure you’ve asked yourself, why can’t I just do what I say I’m going to do? I want to lose weight but I just can’t follow through.
Why You Aren’t Taking The Healthy Action You Want
So, now let’s get into the best part of this episode, why you aren’t taking the action you want to take. Which is, eating healthy.
I have a spoiler for you, it’s not because you’re lazy or not motivated enough.
It’s your thoughts.
The reason you aren’t taking the action you want (aka sticking to your diet) is because part of you wants to take another action which is eating the doughnut. That other part of you thinks that the taste of the maple bar is worth the delay of reaching your weight loss goal.
All actions we take or don’t take are because of the emotion we are feeling. When it came to seeing that maple bar, you probably felt desire to for the taste or deprivation because you can’t have what you want. Maybe it was excitement just thinking about how good it would feel.
Now replace the maple bar with a chocolate covered grasshopper. It’s still a food that someone might find delicious. But for the thought of eating the grasshopper would probably make me feel disgust.
So, from that feeling of disgust you wouldn’t eat the grasshopper.
In both scenarios you have food in front of you. But in one scenario the emotion of desire causes you to eat the maple bar but in the other, disgust causes you to not eat the grasshopper.
No deprivation in that second scenario, right?
The key to managing our emotions that cause our actions is to realize that out thoughts cause our emotions.
The desire for the maple bar is cause by the thought, wow that’s going to taste really good. And the disgust for the chocolate covered grasshoppers is caused by the thought, bugs are gross.
But what about the part of you that wants to lose weight?
You might be wondering about how motivated you feel when thinking about my weight loss goals. How come that motivation isn’t enough?
It’s because the thoughts around wanting to eat the maple bar are stronger and have been around for longer than the thoughts about losing weight. Since you haven’t gotten rid of the original thoughts about wanting to eat the maple bar, you can’t make room for the weight loss thoughts to be your dominating thoughts.
Before you start shaming yourself about eating the maple bar, give yourself a break. You’re up against thoughts that have been around for years.
But don’t worry, you’re not doomed to eat a maple bar every time you see it. There is a way to make your weight loss friendly thoughts more dominant.
How To Take The Action You Want
Think about the last time you ate something that you regretted. Grab a pen and paper to get the exact words you were thinking that led to you eating the food.
Then figure out what you would like to think instead. If your thought is eating that maple bar is going to feel so much better than eating what I planned, you probably don’t want to jump to that maple bar is disgusting because lying to yourself isn’t realistic. And if your original competing thought was I shouldn’t eating that because it’s bad for my weight loss, that thought isn’t going to work either because you’ve already been trying it and it hasn’t eclipsed your desire for the maple bar
But what if you could believe something like “the regret I’ll feel after this maple bar isn’t worth the enjoyment I’ll get in the moment”? Create a thought that you truly believe that makes choosing not to eat the food more desirable that eating it.
The way you bridge the gap between the thoughts that are causing undesirable actions and the thoughts that cause you to take the actions you want for the long term is being purposeful in the thoughts you choose to think.
This is one of the important skills I teach my weight loss clients as they on their journey to permanent and diet free weight loss.
- We act based on how we feel
- And our feelings are caused by our thoughts
- When do things like eat food that we regret it’s because of a thought more ingrained in our mind that the thought that would tell us not to eat the food. We’ve had years of practice thinking these desire causing thoughts
- But being purposeful about the thoughts you are choosing to think will allow you to eventually let go of the original thought so you can start taking the action you want
- Now you know one of the most powerful skills when it comes to lasting weight loss
- Check out the next episode to learn another amazing and important skill